Banjul– In a much-anticipated press conference today, His Excellency Sheikh Professor Alhaji Dr. Yahya Abdul-Aziz Awal Jemus Junkung Jammeh Naasiru Deen Babili Mansa, Chief Commander of The Armed Forces of Gambia and Chief Custodian of the Sacred Constitution of the Gambia, has disclosed to the world that he’s received divine knowledge of who is set to be the next President of the United States.
And it is no other than the former governor of the state of Massachusetts , Mitt Romney.
The distinguished leader, who is said to have conferred upon the Spirits to for such divination; expressed his confidence of an upcoming golden age for the United States at the turn of this election.
The glorious leader went on to disclose, in a heavily accented English, that he has numerous reasons to believe that Romney is the right president for this time.
“I’M QUITE LOOKING FORWARD TO HIS ERA,” SAID MR. JAMMEH.”ON THE ACCOUNT THAT THE FORMER GOVERNOR IS A HUMBLE FOLLOWER OF THE CHURCH OF LATTER DAY SAINTS, HE’S SURELY GOING TO INTRODUCE A 28TH AMENDMENT TO THE CONSTITUTION OF THE UNITED STATES– WHICH WILL LEGALIZE POLYGAMY.”
Mr. Jammeh, however, declined to comment on queries as to how, Mr. Romney, who isn’t currently a contender to the presidency of the United States or in the presidential ticket, will become president all of a sudden.
However, a close associate of the President and another member of his inner circle, have both told AT that President Jammeh has confided to them that it is possible Romney will seize power by mobilizing the Utah Mormon Militia and the bearded Latter Day Secret Police in pursuit of America’s highest office.
It is to be recalled that President Jammeh has previously developed a cure for HIV/AIDS, though despite being dismissed by the world’s leading health authorities, has cured numerous Africans of the dreaded affliction.