Mekele — Scientists at Mekele University’s School of Social Engineering have announced the discovery of a new way to disperse protesting Amhara by using raw meat as an incentive.

The researchers, headed by Dr. Fisshale Kindeya, have been working on the problem through grants acquired from the Tigray Science Endowment and have said they’ve made the startling discovery while experimenting on captive Amharas.

“We were quite surprised to see the pacifying effect raw meat seemed to have on our Amhara test subjects in a lab setting, said Dr. Brchiqo TsadKaneGabir, a member of the research team.

Amazing Results

A Typical Amhara Clansman exhibits sheer glee at the sight of raw and uncooked meat- which is consider a delicacy in Ethiopia

According to the researchers, Amhara adult test subjects under a lab setting scored a minus 14.29 on the Hefflewienzen metacentric stability scale, named after the Prussian pharmacologist.

The researchers, whose method included caging the volatile test subjects and feeding them different foods that are local to Ethiopia were finally able to pacify the subjects after feeding them protein-rich raw meat or raw meat tartar. After a single dose administration, test subjects who initially exhibited high xenophobic rates and referred to the researchers as ‘Agame’ and “Banda”, registered elevated scales of understanding as well as tolerance levels and made cooing and cute sounds.

The researchers are expected to publish their research paper on the acclaimed Journal of Ethiopian Medicine and Buda science this month.

Ethiopian government operatives and security forces have adopted the findings of the research and are reporting being able to have successfully pacified protesters in Gondar.